Over the last few weeks I have had some tough choices to make professionally and personally. This blog is no stranger when it comes to talking growth and the discomfort that normally accompanies such transformations. However, last week added a new dimension to the puzzle that I call my life. I was faced with a situation that I struggled with and didn’t know how to negotiate. Each time I thought I had made a “logical” choice, I was confronted with another nuance of the situation that made me second-guess my decision. It was dizzying, exhausting and confidence-draining; very much like trying on swimsuits after hitting the all you can eat buffets in Vegas ……neither of which I recommend.
But the situation had my wheels spinning…and spinning…and spinning to the point where I literally felt paralyzed. Feeling struck I ended up talking with a life coach to get a unbias opinion and he said something so profound and simple that it struck a chord with me. He simply said “Choose – you are allowed to make a wrong choice.” And he led me through a conversation where we discussed the different paths where my choices could lead me and what I saw as their outcomes. When it was all laid out, I realized that the outcomes, while drastically different in my head, didn’t deviate too far from each other in the end. It wasn’t the outcome that I feared but the action of making a choice — that initial step is what scared me because I kept playing the horrible game I call “What if…..”
We all have played it and honestly, it is no fun. It never has an ending, there are no winners and the board pieces suck. I had the dice in my hand and refused to let them roll because I feared what they would show – a big fat snake eyes. But eventually, taking the coach’s advice, I did choose. And my decision? It didn’t work out the way I intended nor did it kill me, but it did give me a moment where I learned something new. It also made me realize that experience is great for learning opportunities but the real growth comes from say yes to take those chances to learn.
I never thought of myself as a “yes man” but I am beginning to like the sound of it …..
[photo credit: courtney lake]